hell is a place on earth?

finally had the jimmy buffet room at dr. van dorn's this morning. not only are there buffet posters everywhere... a fake palm tree sits in the corner, (parrot on branch not included--but tied.), two autographed albums are over the sink, (guitar picks included in frames), and his music is playing only in that room (not the soft rock station i lurrrve everywhere else in the building). SERIOUSLY. when he came in, he said he was going to make me a "parakeet", which i learned was a child fan. ok:
1) i'm a wo-man.
2) i don't look good in cheeseburger hats.
3) i accidentally starved my parakeet, therefore becoming one sounds like a cruel punishment.
if this periodonist wasn't my new grandfather figure, we'd be fighting. i did save myself by saying i "knew of him, but was not a fan".


oh and one time, i ate at cheeseburger in paradise and the food wasn't that great.
i prefer old country buffet.